Fred and the Chocolate Covered Migraines
by Cresswell Thorne
Summary: Fred helps an unlucky-in-love Hermione celebrate her birthday. In the end, she ends up helping him out too. *FINISHED*
1. Part One

_Just a little something that popped into my head. I absolutely adore the thought of these two together, and I sometimes find it difficult to find a well written/well thought out story with this pairing. So I decided to try my hand at it. I hope you enjoy this little two shot, the second part will be posted a week from today. Reviews are, of course, much appreciated. (This is obviously AU after DH and I don't feel the need to go through the cliché of explaining how Fred survived the war, as it is not pertinent to this particular story). EWE?_

 _Disclaimer: I own nothing!_

* * *

"Ah, ah, ah, and where do you think you're sneaking off to, Miss Granger?"

Hermione cringed, squeezing her eyes shut, gripping her files to her chest as tightly as she could before turning around to face the Weasley twin that had caught her 'sneaking' away from her office. On her birthday, which she hadn't planned to spend with anyone. At least it was just him though. She honestly wouldn't mind chatting with him, but they had to get out of plain sight before someone _else_ caught her leaving for the day.

"Sneaking," she muttered, "I wasn't."

"Mhmm, that's why you're leaving the office 30 minutes early?" He quirked an eyebrow at her.

"Fred I-"

"Ah, so you _can_ tell us apart."

"Of course I can. I've known you for a pretty long time, not to mention we-. Well, needless to say, you're differences are as apparent to me as your obvious similarities." Hermione's cheeks warmed at her near reference to the kiss they'd shared in her fifth year.

Fred narrowed his eyes at her, wondering what thoughts had brought the delicious color to her face. Snatching the files from her arms, he gripped her waist and led her to a Floo.

Hermione halted his progress, and turned inquisitive eyes to the redhead who had his arm wrapped temptingly around her. "Just where are we going, Mr. Weasley?"

"To celebrate your birthday with a drink of course."

"I didn't realize you knew-"

"That it was your birthday? Of course I knew. Isn't that why you were sneaking off? To avoid me?" His bottom lip jutted out in an adorable pout. Oh, how she wished she could bite that lip. She wondered, absentmindedly, if his lips were as soft as they were that winter day all those years ago. It had surprised her, she had rather expected them to be chapped and blistered from the brutal winds. As, she was sure, hers had been.

She scoffed.

"Would you stop interrupting me? It's rude. And no, that is _not_ why I was sneaking out." At his pointed look she put up a hand. "Yes, I admit, I was sneaking out. Not to avoid you, I wouldn't do that, it never even occurred to me that you would be here. Or remember my birthday. I was actually trying to avoid Astoria."

"Okay, I'm going to chose to ignore the part about me not remembering your birthday. But, why are you trying to avoid your best friend?"

"Fred, I don't know how much time you've spent with the Malfoys recently, but Astoria is in match making mode." Honestly, Hermione adored both Draco and Astoria, but she hated being set up. She mostly put up with her best friends antics for the sake of Astoria's son, Scorpius, who also happened to be Hermione's godson.

"And she's got her heart set on setting you up?"

"Yes, I think she still feels guilty about breaking Draco and me up…"

"That was over three years ago. You're so beyond that, for God's sake you're the godmother to their son."

"I know that, you know that, Draco knows that, but Astoria still feels bad. I indulged her whims for awhile, but she sets me up with the biggest gits she knows. Which is why I'm avoiding her, and why I'm trying to escape my office to get home to a bath and a large glass of wine." She ended her rant with a huff.

"Well, we can go back to your flat, but only so you can change. George is already there anyway." Fred nodded towards the Floo, urging her to go first, "I'll be right behind you, love."

When they arrived back at her flat she found that George had rooted through her cabinets and found a box of Biscoff Cookies, stating he wasn't overly fussed about her outfit choice. Fred was, however, and she lead him to her closet to pick out something to wear. When she pulled out a modest blouse and a pair of jeans he shook his head and picked out a daringly tight, red dress from the depths of her closet. The dress had been a gift from Ginny a few years prior, but Hermione had never worn it, the dress still had the tags on it in fact. Hermione conceded to his choice, shoved him out of her bedroom, and rummaged around in her drawers, until she found the lacy, red balconette bra and the matching panties that would best suit her dress.

George seemed almost unimpressed by his brothers choice in clothing for her, rolling his eyes and muttering something about him being 'obvious' and 'unoriginal'. Fred was unconcerned with his twins musings, seemingly floored by her appearance. He had stuttered that she looked great, George had rolled his eyes again, and they made their way down to The Leaky Cauldron.

And that's how she found herself a few hours later, nursing a warm drink at a hightop, watching her friends get completely plastered.

"Granger!" she heard from across the crowded pub.

Waving manically, stood Draco Malfoy, his arm curled protectively around his wife, gesturing her over.

"Stori!" Hermione nearly ran to greet her friends, wrapping Astoria in a tight embrace, "Draco, I'm so happy to see you. What are you doing here?"

Hermione felt a slight tug on her dress and looked down to find the most handsome two year old she knew looking up at her in wonder. Scorpius took a deep breath, puffing out his chest in a way that reminded her scarily of Draco, and put his hands on his hips.

"Auntie Mione, we are here 'cause Mummy and Daddy said you need a _real_ man who can love you forever and ever. Not like that…" Scorpius looked to his father. "What was that word Daddy?"

"Pouf." Draco offered.

"Like that 'pouf' Ernie Macmillan. So… here I am. I can love you forever." Hermione couldn't resist the little gentleman before her and scooped him up, smothering him in kisses. When she glanced back at his parents she noted Astoria had the good grace to look ashamed. Resting Scorpius on her hip, she leveled them with a glare and a raised eyebrow.

"Sorry 'Mione, you know he likes to eavesdrop." Astoria sighed, looking shamefaced.

Draco chuckled, "Don't apologize love, it's true! Her taste in men is atrocious. First there was Adrian Pucey, gak, then Ernie, Merlin help us, the muggle, and now your little 'flirtation' with Blaise Zabini. I daresay the only decent bloke she's dated is _me_. The poor girl."

"Draco!" His wife admonished, somehow managing to look even guiltier.

"Although I suppose Fred Weasley may be the best-" Hermione cut him off with a stiff jab to the ribs.

"Shush. For heavens sake, it was just _one_ kiss back in school, I'm sorry I even told you. My God, you're a bigger gossip than your mother, starting rumors Fred and I were together."

"Maybe not, but I think you wish you were."

Deciding she was done with Darco's nonsense, she turned to his wife. "So, is he really my present?" She asked, hugging Scorpius tightly to her. "Finally got sick of him?"

"Don't worry my love, I'll take good care of you. You just need Auntie Mione." Hermione affectionately nuzzled Scorpius' cheek.

"No, you may _not_ have my heir. Though, we do need a babysitter Monday if you're interested?" Draco nudged her slightly.

"Of course I am, but _why_ might I ask, do you require a babysitter?"

Astoria grasped Hermione's hand tightly in hers. "That's actually why we're here." Her best friend guided their joined hands to rest on her belly. "I'm pregnant!" Hermione felt tears prick her eyes and her heart jump excitedly at the news. Another baby!

"Another godchild for me! This is the best present ever!"

Astoria giggled and embraced her tightly. "Of course you're the godmother, though Daphne is like to kill me when she finds out, but I just can't deny you when you're nearly as excited as we are." And she really was. Hermione was thrilled for her friends and she told them so repeatedly, until Fred sauntered up, slinging an arm about her waist.

"What's all the excitement about then?" Hermione's heart leapt yet again at his touch. She glanced at Astoria with a questioning look and, receiving a nod of approval from the expectant parents, regaled Fred with the wonderful news.

"Not another Malfoy, Merlin save us all!" Fred cried dramatically, all in good humor of course. He snatched Scorpius from her and proceeded to tickle him mercilessly.

"What do you say Scorp, shall we escape now and let the adults talk?" Fred asked the toddler he was holding. Scorpius giggled uncontrollably in his grasp.

"But you _are_ an adult Uncle Freddie!"

"No, not _really."_ And they all laughed at that.

"Besides, I've got a present for you."

"A present for him? It's _my_ birthday. Why is he getting a gift instead of me?" Hermione pouted.

"Don't worry love," he said, dropping a kiss on top of her head. "I'm saving it for later." He whispered the last part in her ear conspiratorially, winked, and was gone. Leaving her to bask in his words that had sent a delightful chill up her spine

"Love, eh Mione? And what'd he whisper to you anyhow?"

"Stuff it Malfoy. I'm going to go find Blaise." In actuality, she couldn't stand the former Slytherin, but she knew it would shut Draco up. Instead, she grabbed a barstool and sat to admire Fred spending time with her godson. He was really rather great with him, with all kids really, it must be in his nature. It was a facet of his personality she was insanely attracted to. And he did look rather delicious in his shirtsleeves and trousers, long, ginger locks pulled back with a blue ribbon she had given him. She loved when he pulled his hair back like that, he looked distinguished and, in a way, so masculine. It reminded her of those trashy romances she and Ginny indulged in every once and awhile.

* * *

Fred Weasley absolutely adored this kid in front of him. He was full of information and secrets he didn't know not to repeat. People obviously underestimated what the kid could remember, or, perhaps, more likely, counted on his penchant for remembering conversations held by adults, hoping he _would_ repeat them. Knowing Scorp's parents, Fred was betting on the latter.

Yes, Draco and Astoria Malfoy, as wonderful as they were, were Slytherins through and through. He really didn't mind their sneaky behavior, as it seemed to him that they were manipulating the situation for _his_ benefit this time.

"-and then Daddy said he was a 'pouf' and they laughed and laughed, so I laughed too, but… Uncle Freddie what does pouf mean?"

Fred tugged at his collar, debating the merit of telling the toddler the meaning of the word. "Er, I think they meant that he's… you know what? You still haven't seen what I brought you!" He pulled a neatly wrapped package out of his pants pocket and handed it to the young boy. Scorpius eagerly ripped through the paper, where most people would have been wary of opening anything handed to them by the infamous Weasley twin, he was happy to note that, at least, someone was too excited to be concerned.

Not that Fred would dream of pranking the young boy, he knew better than that. Between the Malfoys and Hermione, the boy was sufficiently protected.

"What is it Uncle Freddie?" Scorpius asked innocently, holding the Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes product in his hand.

"That is an Extendable Ear. I brought it from the shop to give to you, so you put one end in your ear and the other end where the conversation you want to listen to is and voila you can eavesdrop."

Scorpius put his hands on his hips and pouted petulantly, "I do not eavesdrop, Mummy says only bad boys do that. I'm a good boy." Fred leveled the chid with a skeptical look and was about to open his mouth when Scorpius launched into a mini tirade. "You're a bad boy Uncle Freddie! I'm going to tell Auntie and you're going to get in _big_ trouble mister. Ohhhhh, but I was eavesdropping before we got here… you won't tell will you?" The boy suddenly looked pained and began tugging at his blonde locks.

"Don't worry mate, I won't tell."

"I won't tell on you Uncle Freddie, I'm sorry I said I would." The boy sniffed, casting his gaze downward.

"Buck up there mate, I'm pretty sure your Aunt already knows how bad I am. We have known each other for a rather long time." Fred smiled almost reminiscently at the thought and reached back to touch the scrap of ribbon holding back his hair. "A long time."

Breaking his reverie, Scorpius grasped his uncles face, "That's true, Mummy and Daddy have known each other for a long time too. Is that why they said you're going to get married. I want to go to the wedding! Aunt Daphne's wedding was _so_ much fun. Can I come to the wedding?"

Fred looked at Scorpius in amusement, wondering at the boys ramblings. "I'm not getting marr-"

"Who's wedding are you going to?" Fred straightened his back, tossing his gaze to Hermione who had pulled Scorpius from his chair.

"Uh-"

"Uncle Freddie's wedding silly! I can go right?"

"Oh, I wasn't aware your uncle was engaged. Who is it you're supposed to be marrying?" Hermione asked in a jovial tone. Fred opened his mouth only to be, yet again, halted by Scorpius' ramblings.

"You of course. Mummy and Daddy said _you're_ going to marry him." Scorpius giggled, "You're so silly!"

Fred and Hermione shared a confused look, before settling their gaze on the misguided toddler.

"Mate, we're not getting married. I don't know why your parents told you that." ' _The meddling Slytherins',_ Fred thought.

"Oh, I do." Hermione looked livid and embarrassed, but she was trying to reign in her frustration for the sake of the toddler in her lap. After a few deep breaths, she explained to Scorpius that there wasn't going to be a wedding. That the conversation he had overheard (eavesdropped on) was merely his parents plotting. The toddler pouted, "But, I want to go to a wedding! You have to get married!"

"Scorpius Malfoy, you can't just demand that someone get married because _you_ want to go to a wedding! For goodness' sake pull it together."

Fred, as unhelpful as ever, merely doubled over in laughter over the exchange between Scorpius and Hermione.

"Sorry Auntie Mione." He kissed her cheek, and nuzzled into her neck.

"It's okay, I'm sorry your parents got you all excited for no reason." Honestly, what was wrong with them?

"So, Mione, want to get out of here. Your presents at my flat and you can have that glass of wine you were talking about… Also, you can explain these rumors the Malfoys are starting about us." Fred quirked a ginger brow.

Hermione chuckled, a bit embarrassed and apprehensive about the inevitable explanation she would have to provide him with. She just wished Astoria had kept her big mouth shut.

"Sure, why not? I would kill for a glass of wine right now."

"Great, let me just tell George that we're taking off."

Fred headed over to George and told him he was taking Hermione back to the shop, and George looked skeptically between Hermione and Fred. He looked ready to ask a question, but instead rolled his eyes and handed Fred the box of chocolates he'd gotten Hermione.

"I'm assuming you're staying at Angie's tonight?" Fred questioned his twin.

"Yeah, and if I play my cards right I might even get breakfast."

"Best of luck Gred."

"Oh, you too Forge. You too." George chuckled under his breath, rolling his eyes at his brother.


	2. Part Two

_Disclaimer: I own nothing!_

* * *

Fred and Hermione arrived outside of the shop with a _POP!_ to find that it had started to drizzle. The animatronic Weasley at the front of the building tipped his hat in greeting, while, simultaneously, making the rabbit that had been under it disappear. Fred ushered her inside, where it was warm and bright, and locked the door shut behind them. Cursing Verity for not properly closing the store, he rushed to the back room to shut off the bright, whizzing lights, leaving them in the quiet of the darkness.

"Do you want to head upstairs?" Fred asked, his tone bordering on cautious.

"Yes, you _did_ promise me a glass of wine."

"So I did, lead the way, love." Hermione grinned, mostly at the endearment, and headed up the stairs to the flat Fred and George shared. She happily noted that the main living area was clean and tidy, a first for them.

"Wow, I'm impressed. You're flat looks great, I've never seen it look so good."

Fred looked sheepish, "We all have to grow up sometime, I suppose. Plus, Angelina is always over, and she's been pressuring us to be adults. Cook, clean, do laundry, you know, grown up stuff." He shrugged stiffly, seeming a bit uncomfortable in his ramblings.

"Aren't you the one who just told my godson that you weren't really an adult?" She grabbed the box of chocolates and headed into the kitchen. He followed closely behind her, and found a bottle of wine in a cabinet. Rummaging around in a drawer, Hermione found the bottle opener, and passed it to him wordlessly.

"Thanks, well, yeah, I guess I did say that. I am trying to be better though." Fred looked as if he wanted to say more, so she gestured for him to continue as she lifted herself up to sit on the countertop. And he did, but only after pouring them each a generous glass of wine and gulping his share down in one go. "I'm pretty sure George is going to pull his head out of his arse here pretty soon and propose to Angelina. I'm also aware that I'm almost thirty with nothing to show for it."

"Nothing to show for it? Fred that's not true, you run a successful business, you're independently wealthy, and you have a lovely and rather large extended family to show for it." She was feeling rather helpless at his forlorn look.

Fred shook his head, glancing down at his hands, before pouring himself another glass of wine. "None of it matters, when I have no one to share it with." He ran his finger along the rim of his wine glass and joggled his leg, in a nervous tick.

"Why are you acting so nervous?" She ran her hand down his arm, and laced their fingers together to tug him closer.

"I-I'm not. Er, I'm not. It's just, it's just I think I'm in love with you." Fred managed to stammer out. Although, as soon as he had said the words he looked horrified and tried to take a step back. There was no way he was getting away that easy. Strengthening the grip she had on his hand, she pulled him to her with all her might, to stand between her parted thighs. Foreheads nearly touching.

"Did you just say you're in love with me?" Hermione's heart was pounding. She wasn't sure her feelings were love, but she knew she wanted him. Had wanted him for years. She knew that she _could_ be in love with him. That she could fall in love with him so easily, and all she needed was a little push. A little confirmation that she wasn't alone in her feelings, before she admitted it.

"Yeah, I think I did. I'm sorry, I shouldn't ha-." She cut him off with a bruising kiss. If he was shocked, it didn't show, because he seamlessly fitted their lips together and brought his hand up to cradle her cheek. Squeezing their interlocked hands together, Hermione wrapped her legs about his waist and pulled him snugly against her. He broke away panting and grinned lazily. "I've wanted to do that all night."

"So why didn't you?" She asked, dazedly.

Fred chuckled lightly, flushing a bit, "I didn't think you wanted me to. What I mean to say, is that I never thought my feelings would be reciprocated."

"Why would you think that?"

"Look at you; you're beautiful, brilliant, successful, and look at me. Compared to you, I'm nothing but a clown. How could I possibly think you felt the same way?" Her heart restricted painfully in her chest to think that she had given him cause to feel that way.

"That's not true. Tell me you don't really feel that way." She practically sobbed. "I've had feelings for you since before we kissed. The _first_ time."

"You've had feelings for me since you were in your fifth year?" Fred's eyebrows were raised in surprise and his voice incredulous. He really had no idea how she felt about him. At all. Jumping off the counter, she pressed the length of her body along his. She smiled brightly at his astonished expression and brushed a ginger lock away from his eyes. "Of course I have, you don't think I would have kissed you back that day if I didn't fancy you, do you?"

"Kissed me back?" He scoffed, "I'm sorry, if memory serves, and it usually does, _you_ kissed _me."_

Rolling her eyes at the blatant fabrication of events, she tugged him down to her, "Shut up." She murmured, and kissed him chastely. The kiss started out light, but quickly evolved into harsh nips, both of their tongues fighting for dominance. Bracing one hand on the counter, Fred leveraged his other under her bum and lifted her so she could clutch her legs about his waist.

' _Oh God',_ she thought, as she wrapped her arms around his neck, weaving her fingers into his hair. She could feel him through his jeans, and she, experimentally, rubbed against his heat, the seam of his zipper catching her in just the right spot. At her delighted moan, he hiked her further up his body, and the next thing she knew she was laying on the couch with him hovering over her. His blue eyes were alight and dilated with desire and his hair was mussed beyond repair, but she thought he had never looked sexier.

Gripping a handful of his shirt, she pulled him to her and reached behind him to tug the ribbon from his hair, tossing it carelessly to the floor. He growled at that and knelt between her parted thighs, grabbing one in each of his hands, grip firm. He leaned down to take her lips again, giving her thighs a swift jerk so she was flush against him. Hermione was overwhelmed with want, she simply couldn't get enough of him. She quickly set to work on his buttons, ripping the offending shirt from his chest. Rearing back, Fred sat up and pulled her legs together to rest on his shoulder, smoothing a calloused hand down her calf, past her knee, over her voluptuous thigh, to skim over the red lace of her panties. She moaned and bucked into his hand as his fingers lightly caressed her through the thin material. With one last kiss pressed to her swollen lips, Fred slid both of his hands under her bum and gripped the elastic band of her panties. And in one deft movement, they were pulled off of her, tossed to the rug to keep his hair ribbon company.

Eyes smoldering, Fred took one look at her bare pussy and inhaled deeply.

"You are the sexiest thing I have _ever_ seen, Hermione Granger. And I bet you're going to be the most delicious thing I've ever tasted. I can't wait to find out." And with that, he smoothed her her thighs apart and delved right in.

The first swipe of his tongue shocked her, granted it had been awhile, but no one had ever been so enthusiastic and forthright in their explorations. He worked his tongue against her clit for a moment, making it swell with need. She already felt close. Fred pulled back a bit and ran his tongue from her clit to her opening and, after circling it once, pierced her hole with the tip of his tongue. Crying out, Hermione gripped his hair and forced him in deeper. Never had she been so aroused.

"Oh Merlin, Fred. Please!" Hermione realized, in that moment, that she was only a few well executed licks from climax.

Encouraged by the frantic need in her voice and the death like grip she had on his hair, he speared his tongue in and out of her dripping slit and brought his thumb to press against her clit. She shattered instantly, her cries of ecstasy echoing throughout the flat. He pulled away gasping, only after easing her down from her climax with gentle laps with the flat of his tongue, to give her a passionate kiss.

Breathing heavily, he collapsed next to her, and she took the opportunity to straddle his hips and work open his trousers. When her hand found his length through his boxers, he was helpless to the need to arch into her touch. Smoothing her palm against him, she moved her mouth to nibble at his neck. Nipping a path to his ear, she panted against his heated flesh, causing goose bumps to erupt down his neck.

"Wait right here," she whispered, throwing herself off of him to head into the kitchen. She returned only moments later with the chocolates from George, carefully unwrapping the box, and selecting a piece from within it. Plucking it out, she climbed back onto the couch, resting her legs on either side of his hips, but without putting any weight on him. She was trying to kill him, he was practically dying for friction, and she was hovering, just barely, above him. He would swear that he could feel her heat. He shifted his hips a bit and, when he could take it no more, bucked desperately against her.

"Fred, be patient." She slowly lowered herself onto him leaning forward slightly so breasts swayed temptingly in his face. At his whimper, she pulled away, clearly disappointed in his reaction, to retrieve the chocolate. She popped it in his mouth and leaned back down to trail kisses down his neck and onto his chest. He chewed it quickly, desperate to use his mouth for something else.

When she gently bit at his nipple he nearly lost it, and moved to flip them over. But when he sat up a blinding pain shot through him. He screwed his eyes shut and let out a pitiful moan, he couldn't hardly think the pain was so intense.

"Are you okay?" He waved off her question and brought a hand to massage his temples. She gingerly stood up and tugged her dress down, genuinely concerned for him.

Fred coughed lightly and dropped back onto the couch, groaning.

"Do you think it was the wine? You did have a bit to drink…" she trailed off uncertainly. He shook his head lightly, clenching his teeth together, anything to distract him from the ear splitting headache that was raging inside him.

"No," he gasped. "It was the damn chocolate. Chocolate Covered Migraines."

"The chocolate- George! I can't believe he tried to prank me on my own birthday! And you, poor thing, got the brunt of the joke. I'm so, so sorry" She quickly summoned a hot rag and gently put it over his eyes and forehead.

"S'okay, had to test these when we first started producing them. Used to it. They are damn brutal though. The effects last for about an hour and a half. I'm sorry."

"There's no need to be sorry, it's not _your_ fault. But you're _brother_ is going to be sorry."

"That's my girl." Fred grinned brightly, clearly regretting it when, a moment later, his face contorted into a grimace. Hermione sighed deeply, it was going to be a long night.

"Alright, budge over. I guess we'll just cuddle. Wake me if you need anything." She carefully draped a throw over their intertwined bodies.

"Yeah." He leaned over to place a gentle kiss on her temple, before curling his arm about her waist and pulling her to him tightly. It would take a while for him to be comfortable enough to sleep, but he didn't mind. He had been waiting for a moment like this for a long time. Now he just needed to find a way to get back at George. Maybe Hermione would have a good idea. She was rather brilliant.

* * *

George arrived home late the next morning, only to find that all of his underthings had been transfigured into skimpy, lace underwear and realized, too late, that his favorite shampoo had been replaced with a hair removal potion. Ah well, it was worth the pain of regrowing his hair when he saw Hermione and Fred curled up together on the couch.

But that wasn't to say he wouldn't retaliate.


End file.
